I’m sure you are wondering why I am writing about my inefficient pen, but don’t worry, I am about to fill you in.
Today I decided to take a break from studying and bike to one of my favorite spots. I grabbed my bible, hopped on my bike and took off… Well “took off” may be a bit enthusiastic. I peddled myself to my favorite spot, and grabbed a seat at one of the picnic tables.
Right now, I am at a place where my routine is daunting. It seems like every day is the same: school to home to studying to bed. I’ve creeped back into school mode, and now it consumes my thoughts, 100% of the time.
I’m sure you can relate, be it your job, kids, home, etc. Sometimes we just get to a point where we cannot even remember what day it is because does it really matter? If everyday looks the same, then how would I ever keep up with which is which?
Anyways, back to the point of this whole thing.
I sit at the picnic table, and bring out my bible. I’m reading along with my church’s bible plan so I was in Isaiah, II Corinthians, Psalms, and Proverbs. After reading for thirty minutes, I sat back to think about what I had just read.
I take out my journal and pen, getting ready to write about how all of those verses apply to my life. Without even realizing it, I was performing yet another routine. SO ANNOYING. All of a sudden, my pen stops writing. I start scribbling, licking the pen, doing all that I can to get the thing to write, and it won’t. It just stopped.
In that moment I realized exactly what I needed to do: just stop. As hard as it was for me to think about, I just had to stop.
That is when the real reflection happened. I wasn’t monotonously writing what I should have learned from those passages. I was talking to my Father in Heaven about how distant and robotic I have become, not just with Him but with many parts of my life.
I don’t know if you can relate to this, but I urge you to just stop. Close your eyes and talk to the Lord. Be genuine with Him because that is all He wants. I think its so easy to get caught up in the idealistic relationship with Christ. The one where you read your bible and pray religiously. Key word: religiously.
I hate religion, but in moments of routine, I find myself there. That’s when I feel like I am reaching out to God and I only sink further from Him.
Sometimes we just have to stop, like my pen, and just exist.
Take a moment today to just stop. Give that routine and all the anxiety that comes with it to Jesus. He does not want us to live that way. He does not care about religion, He cares about our souls.
Be real with Jesus. Stop writing, be still, and know that He is God.